Desperation
by iliyana
Summary: Seifer and Squall have a moment to themselves during time compression and say their goodbyes, for now. SeiferxSquall, a little dark, perhaps bittersweet.


Disclaimer: All of Final Fantasy 8 belongs to the demigods at Square Enix and Sony and it makes me sad.  
Set during time compression.  
**Warning: **here there be love between two boys, in this case Seifer and Squall. Don't like, don't read.

An endless barren wasteland, a grey sky not made of clouds and an atmosphere reeking of magic so thick you could almost touch it. Never had he thought time compression would be anything like this, a place that felt so inherently wrong, a place where he felt so entirely alone, isolated, abandoned….

He wandered on for what felt like hours, his footsteps not once making a sound on the even, rocky ground and the light around him ever growing gloomier.

He marched on and on, mood sinking further with every step, until he reached the end of wherever he was and sat down there, left with just enough dignity to refrain from collapsing.

It was hopeless, he'd never felt this lost in his entire life and as he stared deeper into the swirling mass encompassing the strangely floating island he was on, he could almost feel despair digging its claws into him, eating away at any hope he might still possess.

He didn't know how long he sat there, huddling in his jacket, curling up much like a child would, when, suddenly, a hand touched his shoulder and all the anguish he felt left him in a dizzying rush. He turned, quickly and trying to get to his feet at the same time, but a second hand took place on his other shoulder as if it simply belonged there and pushed him down in his original position. He didn't struggle, knowing only one person who would dare to treat him like that, and waited patiently until he felt long, strong legs wrap around him and the hands moved from his shoulders to rest on his stomach.

They sat like that for ages; the only sound the occasional whisper of their clothes as they shifted, caresses light and tender, the barely there brush of the tip of a finger across a cheek, a shoulder pressing just a bit into a warm chest….

Eventually, not knowing how much time had passed by then, Squall spoke up.

"Come back with me."

No immediate response came to his plea, disguised as an innocent request, and they sat in the same position for some time longer, their touches growing more urgent and needy as, deep inside, they felt it was almost time to move on.

"I can't."

Seifer's voice was rough around the edges, betraying the warring emotions he wouldn't show, nor voice. Torn between the desire to go back, to go home, but to find himself shunned and the knowledge that, if he stayed a little longer, things would be easier, but he'd have to miss Squall for so much longer.

In the end, they got back up, turning to face each other, their eyes meeting across a distance that was at once non-existent and the greatest they'd ever had to cross.

"You're s-"

He'd wanted to ask one more time, wishing so badly that this was easier, that things always worked out in the end, like a fairytale, but the tip of Seifer's index finger came to rest on top of his lips, shushing him as the blond shook his head, the look in his eyes stating clearly that if Squall asked one more time, he wouldn't be able to resist.

They stood like that a while longer, until the quieting finger moved and Seifer leaned closer, kissing Squall not with the gentlest, merest brush of lips, but with a desperation that bordered on raw need, lust and something so much more precious, all focused into that simple touch of lips to lips and the brush of tongues.

Time passed again and neither knew just how long they held each other close enough to feel the other's heartbeat, but, in the end, Seifer let go and took a step back, smiling vaguely and mouthing a goodbye at Squall, not even trusting his own voice as he turned and walked away into the ominous darkness.

He fell to his knees now, still resisting the urge to let even a single tear roll down his cheeks and sat in the same space for hours on end, each second feeling like an eternity, until a white feather drifted down in front of him, appearing from out of nowhere.


End file.
